Words and their meanings have been quite a hot topic lately: how they are used, how the meanings have changed, how they hurt. Whole those conversations are being played out in the public sphere now, but trust me, I’m NOT throwing my hat into that ring anytime soon. But what I will say is how we use words to describe ourselves have a lot of weight in how we view and feel about ourselves, and even the trajectory of our lives. Just recently, I was in contact with a friend and was telling her how I’m back to really focused on making art. She was pretty happy for me. I said something along the line of it “being long overdue”. But you know what, I immediately regretted saying that. I corrected myself and said that perhaps this is happening now because this is exactly the right time, that this is happening now because it needs to. That’s the way time works, and life works on timing. By saying that “it’s long overdue”, I’m not giving life’s unpredictability the space and respect it demands. For example, the question of what are my plans for the next five years has always rubbed me in a weird way. I’ve always thought that my plans are simply to stay alive and live as well as I can. But that question usually demands some grand answer. What does that answer do to our self perception and the road we see before us? Does it place a lot pressure on ourselves? Does it motivate us? Does it make us depressed because it was all talk with no course of action what so ever? I can speak for myself and say that I’ve been on this earth long enough to know that words do indeed have weight, and saying that’s “it’s been long overdue” only produces guilt, and diminishes the progress of what I’ve done in the here and now. Guilt is poison, especially when I haven’t done anything to feel guilty to begin with, it’s purely unreasonable. But that pressure, and subsequent guilt, we place on ourselves just defeats us. It weighs us down, makes us question the validity of our work, and even question our own self-worth. I guess that’s why daily affirmations are so popular: they recognize that maybe all we have is right now, and to count those blessings while we’re at it.
And speaking of counting our blessings, I’ve been very busy working on more journals and some other things that I will share in the very near future. The weather is turning for the chillier here in NYC, and I’m preparing for it. Like I said, I will share!
Thank you good folks for stopping by
Jos